Friday, March 20, 2009

It is in the thirties that we want friends ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald

Boyfriend is out of town. When he is gone I have a very difficult time sleeping. I just don't feel tired. Maybe I am nervous about being the only adult? Or maybe the idea of being in bed alone just isn't appealing? In any case I didn't get to bed till after 1am (which, incidentally means I had 4 1/2 hours of sleep, but that's a whole 'nother topic!)
Since I couldn't sleep I stayed up and watched "Miss Potter," it just happened to come in the mail when I could watch a nice girly movie, while finishing 2 baby quilts. In the movie Beatrix Potter becomes, as #1 put it so eloquently recently, "fast friends" with her publisher's/lover's sister. When they met the sister said "I have decided you and I will be friends!"
I also read a friend's blog recently when her daughter made friends very quickly with another little girl because she said she was cute!
I only wish I could make friends that easily!!
And in trying to figure out my difficulty, I will use this blog as my therapy (it would be much more comfortable lying on a couch though!)
It takes me a while to open myself up to people and be okay with not being perfect around them. Yet, another issue stemming from my OCD! And, recently it seems, when I finally get to that point of trust, they just move! And I have to start all over again with trusting others.
Lately I have been looking at others as assets in my life. I try to decide what each specific person has to teach me. Maybe there is some reason God put them in my path. And I need to figure out what I can learn from them. That way, even if they do move, I have felt the benefit of there presence in my life and can move on without regrets.
But I want to know what your secrets are? How do you make friends quickly? How do you judge who would be a good friend? Do you have many close friends? How do you maintain those relationships despite busy families, work, etc?
An another note...and speaking of friends...today is Fred Roger's birthday!! Happy Birthday Neighbor.

7 comments:

Melanie said...

Funny thing, I just finished watching that movie. So good right?

And I can be of no help to you as I've struggled with the same problem myself. And the struggle started when I got married. I don't get it. I feel like I forgot how to make friends. Maybe I use Marshall as a crutch to not go out on my own and be social. Why make new friends when I can just socialize with him? But I've come to realize in recent years, those friendships are necessary for us moms. It's like therapy to be able to get together with friends so you can relate, relax and just have fun.But getting to that point...not sure. It's been a struggle for me too. Let me know if you figure it out.

dastew said...

My problem is a bit different. I'm incredibly social and love social settings. However, I have an incredibly hard time letting people get into my head and knowing anything besides my superficial outward appearance. I'm getting better at it.

Sara said...

Hey Summer, I'm so sorry you're feeling a little down. I'm bummed that I'm away. I'm feeling a little like you right now . . . not knowing how, or in my case, if, I can make new friends. I think the hardest thing for me, is learning what I was, and in some cases, wasn't suposed to learn from them. For that reason, I tend to close myself off for awhile, and then try again. You're such a good person. You taught me so much while I was there with you . . . wish I could still be around to learn more from and about you. I miss you. I was wondering, though, if you could give me some recipe ideas from that diet that you were so successful with??? My father-in-law has been asked, by his doctor, to make some major changes and I will be doing majority cooking and thought I could still learn from you, even though we are 2000 miles apart! I meant to tell you that Tim was completely impressed with your weight loss over the last few months we were around. Now, that's big, if Tim noticed something like that. Take care, and get ahold of me if you have the time. Love you!

jlbunting.com said...

It is hard to make new friends. I try to look for someone that I have something in common with and then I have to break out of my shell and approach them in some way. I've always wondered how I can make friends with someone outside of church. That seems to be the only place I meet people. But, my biggest problem is that once I move away, I am a terrible friend and the people I loved never hear from me again. I guess that is normal? Anyway, I am glad to call you my friend. I think we had it easy. Somebody knew what they were doing when they matched us up.

Summer said...

Becky-I thought our friendship began really easily too. I think I was hoping it would always be that easy!

Summer said...

Sara- You know I adore you and miss you. I'll email you some ideas for recipes and other calorie/fat cutting tips. Hope you're having fun in PA!

Sara said...

summer, email me at sarafultz@gmail.com. my comcast account was cancelled. love you!